Reflect & Recalibrate: Shifting Your Energy When You’re Triggered
Have you ever found yourself in a moment where someone says or does something, and suddenly, you’re in full-blown reaction mode? Your heart rate spikes, your mind starts racing, and before you know it, you’re either lashing out, shutting down, or spiraling in self-doubt. We’ve all been there. These moments—our triggers—are like flashing warning signs telling us there’s something deeper going on beneath the surface.
But here’s the good news: You don’t have to stay stuck in reaction mode. You have the power to pause, reflect, and recalibrate. You can shift into a different, more empowered level of energy.
Step 1: Notice the Trigger
The first step in shifting your energy is awareness. Pay attention to what’s happening in your body and mind when you’re triggered. Ask yourself:
What emotion just showed up? (Anger, frustration, insecurity, fear?)
Where do I feel it in my body? (Tension in the chest? Tightness in the jaw?)
What thoughts are running through my head? (Are they helpful or harmful?)
Awareness creates space. When you name the trigger, you take back control.
Step 2: Identify the Story You’re Telling Yourself
Triggers are often tied to old stories—beliefs we’ve carried for years. Maybe someone’s tone reminded you of a past hurt, or maybe their words reinforced an insecurity you already had. Ask yourself:
What assumption am I making right now?
Is this thought based on fact or feeling?
What’s another way to see this situation?
Reframing your perspective can weaken the hold of the trigger.
Step 3: Breathe & Reset
Your nervous system is your greatest ally in shifting energy. When you’re triggered, your sympathetic nervous system (fight-or-flight) takes over. The fastest way to shift into calm, conscious action is through your breath. Try this:
Box Breathing: Inhale for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4. Repeat 4 times.
1:2 Extended Exhale: Inhale for 4 counts and exhale for 8. This activates the parasympathetic nervous system and promotes relaxation.
Deep Belly Breathing: Place a hand on your stomach. Inhale deeply through your nose, feeling your belly rise. Exhale slowly and fully, releasing tension.
Sigh It Out: Take a deep breath in through your nose, then sigh audibly through your mouth. Let it all go, releasing any built-up stress.
These techniques interrupt the stress response and bring you back to the present moment, allowing you to respond with clarity instead of reacting from impulse.
Step 4: Choose a Higher Energy Response
Energy is everything. The way we react determines the level of energy we bring to a situation. Using the Energy Leadership framework, we can choose a more conscious response:
Victim mode (Level 1): “Why does this always happen to me?” → Instead, ask, “What can I learn from this?”
Anger mode (Level 2): “This is unfair!” → Instead, shift to curiosity: “What else could be true here?”
Responsibility & Compassion (Levels 3-5): “How can I take ownership of my response?” “What’s the best version of me that can show up here?”
The key is pausing long enough to choose how you want to respond, rather than reacting unconsciously.
Step 5: Anchor a New Response
Once you’ve shifted your energy, reinforce it with action. Try:
Journaling what you learned from the experience
Moving your body (walk, stretch, shake off the energy)
Practicing gratitude for the awareness you gained
Setting an intention for how you want to show up next time
You Are Not Your Triggers Remember, triggers aren’t a sign of failure—they’re invitations to grow. Every time you reflect and recalibrate, you strengthen your ability to stay in control of your energy and emotions. And over time, what once triggered you will become just another moment that you navigate with grace and power.
Now it’s your turn:
Think of a recent moment that triggered you. How did you respond?
What’s one shift you can make next time?
Mastering your energy is a lifelong practice, but every small shift adds up to lasting transformation.
